I woke up this morning completely alone. My husband left for work at the crack of
dawn and the kids spent the night with my parents. It is very strange, this lack of activity in my house. Normally, I’d have put at least one kid in
time out, taken a speed shower, cleaned up a spilled drink, changed a diaper,
fed three people, struggled with getting all of us dressed and done my best to
straighten up the house; all before 9:00. It’s 9:10 now and I’m sitting in silence in front of the computer
screen. It’s an odd feeling, typing
without interruption. I’m so used to
doing all of my work in 5-10 minute increments that I’m a little concerned the
quality of my writing will suffer as a result.
As I was getting dressed I tried to recall the last time
that I was truly alone in my house. I
could not come up with anything. I
honestly do not think that I have had any quality alone time since I had
children. Someone is always here making
some type of request. An observer in my
home on an average day would be hard pressed to witness a ten-minute period
that did not involve some type of Mom request. They never stop. My daughter
even calls out for me during the night.
It’s amazing what we can get used to. I don’t remember life without kids. I remember the big events: the carefree
vacations and the frequent date nights; but I don’t remember daily life. My husband and I were married five years
before the first child came along so we had lots of time to live a carefree lifestyle and I am very grateful for those years. In some respects, though, it feels like my
life didn’t really start until I had children. That’s when I found my groove. That’s when I discovered my first true sense of purpose. So, am I enjoying this silence this
morning? Absolutely. Do I want it to continue long term? No way. When your primary purpose is providing comfort, nourishment,
entertainment and support to two irrational, little human beings, the coveted
surplus of silence and time feels surprisingly empty and boring.
P.S.: Clearly my
writing did suffer as a result of the silence. This entry is very sentimental and unfunny. Sorry folks, back to the funny stuff tomorrow.