Monday, January 22, 2007

Feathers are Falling

My son’s 666 may be fading slowly but the feathers are
falling off of my daughter’s angel wings at warp speed. As with my son, I noticed many changes in my
daughter's behavior upon returning from vacation. Hers were, unfortunately, not so positive.  I'd love to blame these changes on her Grandparents but, alas, I'm pretty sure they are just coincidental. Gone is the sweet content little girl who smiled all of the time
and never needed anything. In her place
is a strong willed little girl who knows exactly what she wants and will not
stop until she gets it.

I witnessed the first tantrum the day after I returned from vacation. It was a beautiful sunny
day and I took the kids outside to play. My son drove his cozy coup up and down the driveway while my daughter,
always the mimic, straddled her ride-on toy and shadowed her brother. About 15 minutes into our play session, my
daughter decided that she would like to drive the cozy coup. My son was less than thrilled with this
decision. He held the door shut with
all of his might, saying “No Sissy. It’s mine.” My daughter pulled
on the door with a surprising amount of force and stared at
me, jogging in place rapidly and producing a combination whine/cry that I can
only describe as the most annoying sound in the world. I explained to my daughter (in vain I knew
but I had to give it the old college try) that the car was her brother’s and
that she would have to wait her turn. I
then physically removed her hands from their death grip on the door and walked towards her ride-on toy.

I was in complete shock when, as I was carrying her, she
arched her back and screamed in my arms. She kicked and thrashed and cried. It was a legitimate tantrum.  I
attempted to put her down next to her toy but her body went limp and she
refused to stand. I laid her on the
ground beside the toy and let her throw her fit. I sat down and attempted to digest the fact that the terrible
twos were right around the corner. My
baby wasn’t a baby anymore and, along with the adorableness of toddler-hood,
came the irrational behavior and tantrums. Can I really go through this again? Is it better or worse that her terrible twos seem to be starting much
earlier than my son's? I ran upstairs
(during the kids’ naps) and dusted off my “What to Expect: the Toddler Years”
book. I looked up “handling tantrums,”
poured myself a glass of wine and thanked God that my son seemed to have
miraculously acquired a healthy dose of self control and rationality. It could not have come at a better
time. Armed with my book and some wine, I’m
ready for battle. Bring it on little


  1. with the tremendous amount of improvement to your first born after his stay with the Tennessee Grandparents, I'm glad that you're not trying to pass blame for lil' Sweet Tater turning a little sour. Are you sure you brought the right kids home from Sweet Water? Could it be there is a time warp to some reverse universe on the road between your parents house and yours? This switch in behavior roles is a bit confusing. I do remember when Aunt Beckie's youngest was into throwing herself backward when she didn't get her way, I believe this slowed or stopped after she realized that the floors at Grandma Mary's were oak and did not give as well as carpet when struck by a small head going backward. I do know that Aleita has grown into a loving' caring 3 yr. old (when she wants to be, and on her terms), I have no doubt that my little sweet Tater will be back soon, your only hope is that they don't start to conspire against you while you take YOUR nap after hitting the old wine bottle. *Footnote* do any of the people that write those children's psyco books really have kids of their own???

  2. I think Hailey, at 12 1/2 months is turning into her brat of a mother. I sat down to catch up on the blog. Hailey was pulling on my hair. I told her that if she does it one more time, she would go in her play yard. (Or her baby cage as Carni loves to put it!!) She went for a chunk, warped it around her hand and yanked. I picked her up, said "Now what did I tell you? You are going into your play yard." I sat her down, (She still had a good amount of hair, it just wasn't on my head anymore.) She looked up and gave me the, if you hurry, I won't cry look. I had time to sit down, pull the computer back on my lap. Then the screaming started. I told her she was okay. "No Mom, done!" over and over and over. I looked up to see her throw herself down, flat on her face. Kicking, screaming, fist pumping, and crying started in. Thinking she hurt herself, I threw the computer to the side, jumped over the side of the play yard, missing landing on top of her by inches, oops. She looked up, smiled, stood up, and grabbed my hair. My mother, mean while just laughed, and said I deserved it. Now how sad is that?

  3. Papa Dale-
    I wonder about the people who write those books too. They seem to have all of the answers but none of them work.
    Glad to hear Miss Aleita is growing out of her fit-throwing stage. It gives me hope!

  4. Linda-
    Hair pulling is the worst! I couldn't, however, get past the fact that your 12 1/2 month old is saying complete sentences. Is she some kind of prodigy?? :)

  5. "No" "mom" and "done" are the only words she does say. She says them all the time, it just so happened that it worked for that scenario! I ask her if she wants Cheerios and she says "no, done" as she is stuffing her face!

  6. Ah, the call for independence is setting in our children. Ben my almost 2 year old is learning fast. If I cry I will get my way. I was fixing Choc. Chip pancakes this am, he wanted some Choc. chips, if I cry, I will succeed. I gave in the first time, then hello- what am I doing? Uuugh!! The struggle to be independent and to get what he wants is in full swing now. Good luck w/ Tantum! I guess I need to uncover my WTEin the toddler years too.
    Then on top of that I am working on the "whiner" in the house. Trey keeps telling me "I don't want you to yell at me or spank me anymore". I ask the same of him except of course the spanking part. If you yell I will yell? What? Where is Supper Nanny? Really what works best for Trey is getting on his level and talking to him in a calm voice. Then I think why should I get on his level? To avoid yelling or dominating him?? But, aren't I the parent. Uuugh
    Trail and tribulations!