Top Eight Signs that Halloween is Over:
- You had your first Tootsie Roll at 8:30 am.
- Your children woke up in their costume, confused because they passed out in a sugar coma last night.
- You keep reliving your interaction with the fifteen year old, costume-less punks who rang your doorbell, asking you to fill their pillowcases with candy. Why the hell did you give in? Next year's plan: order custom fortune cookies with the message, "You should have worn a costume" printed on the fortune slip to pass out to unsuspecting teenage punks.
- You start putting away money for your child's next dentist appointment.
- You have to resist the urge to throw the contents of the plastic pumpkins into the garbage disposal to save your growing waistline.
- You don't care if you never see a piece of candy corn again. Good riddance high fructose corn syrup nuggets.
- You hear this come out of your mouth, "Yes, you can have another piece of candy if you eat this baby carrot."
- You call your husband at work and accuse him of stealing all of the Snickers.